2 poems by Caroline Druitt

You should try

Filling a bath with grains of rice and lying in it. Dry up. 

Writing God Loves You! on a sign and tacking it to your bedroom window. 

Taking a freshly picked dandelion and flaying it against a brick. 

Going to the nearest photocopier, squashing your face against cold glass and pressing print. 

Cutting a crop circle with shears in the garden, standing in the middle and Omming. 

Loading a paddling pool with cat litter and immersing yourself until crisp. 

Buying the latest electric shock machine and blasting yourself whenever you feel self pity. 

Removing all words with the letter A from your vocabulary. 

Taking a duvet cover, cutting holes out for the arms and eyes and wearing this to the next appointment. 

Getting pregnant, having a second body to house will make your first one more habitable. 

Covering your bed with silica gel packets and diving in, make sure you stay submerged until desiccated.

It ended during a Top Boy episode

Lauryn is hiding in the bathroom 

when Dushane comes looking.

Her cheeks pale like the tub 

she cowers in, she’s dead 

if he finds her. ‘She deserves it’ 

you say, no crack in your voice, 

‘Shouldn’t be sleeping with bad 

men.’ A half rolled spliff lies 

on the table next to us, the paper 

spilling out its tobacco green guts. 

Bad. Men.

My geranium candle flares.

The episode never finishes. 

I still think of Lauryn, 

I hope she survived.

________

Caroline’s poems have been published by AndOtherPoems, Lucent Dreaming, The North and commissioned by Apples and Snakes. In 2023, she was longlisted for the Out-Spoken Prize for Poetry, shortlisted for the Bridport Prize and the Aesthetica Creative Writing award, and commended in the National Poetry Competition. 

These poems were chosen by Anthropocene Guest Editor HLR.