This will not actually kill you. / Unless a married couple dies at the exact same time, they too die alone. / You will probably never have to go through a divorce. / You will probably never have a child, and therefore your future child cannot disappoint you or terrify you by getting sick or staying out late or running away from home. / Although you have not found “The One,” you have found plenty of people who want to have sex with you, which is more than your 16-year-old or 20-year-old self could have anticipated. / You’re just too interesting. / Too vibrant. / Too smart. / OK, rewind. You aren’t too anything. You are. You are. You are. / Just stop and imagine a hand on your breast. / Just stop and imagine a hand on your thigh. / It is worth it, for the touch. / It is worth it for the revising of lonely teenage insecurities (despite the danger that they will be re-etched). / After telling a friend about therapy, she suggested trying, “I am open to seeing what unfolds,” and that one is actually pretty good. / I am open to seeing what unfolds. / I am open. / I am open for business. / I am open for kissing on a park bench. / I am open for kissing in a car. / I am open for kissing against a car. / I can be open or closed. / I can be closed when I need to be closed. / It is not cold to fail to fall in love with any and every man who wants you. / You are a warm beating heart that has loved hard and long and wrong. / Better aim is an obtainable goal. /
You will aim your love. / Your love will be given to one who can hold it. / You are a beautiful
crier, but he will learn this so late./ By necessity, it will all expose you, but it’s your own choice, exposure like the bralette strap sliding down your shoulder, exactly as you want it to.
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Megan McDermott is a Massachusetts-based poet and priest. She is author of Jesus Merch: A Catalog in Poems and two chapbooks, Woman as Communion and Prayer Book for Contemporary Dating.
This poem was chosen by Anthropocene Guest Editor HLR.
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