Confession

sometimes,

I sit on God’s great tongue and let him

pamper me

as a child

I reached out for his many faces

but only ever found one,

makeup drowning white cheeks

yellowed teeth

and always the mask slipped

today I’m aiming for rapture

God lick me up and down

and scold me-

I don’t mind

Red room in dead city

the artist paints fruit

floating, shadowless

all the dear things she loves

chews on, spits

onto the Canvas

soon she’ll die, content in flowing robes

I hear

a man laughing

he is Father

no you are not dying he says

only ever so small.

I paint the artist

who paints the shadowless fruit

and floating

_________________

Vanessa Ackerman is a writer, actor and educator based in Cambridge, UK. Her writings and translations have appeared in publications such as Routledge Companion, Amethyst Review, Uppagus , Marble Poetry and Black Jack Editions. Her first full length play, Love, No Country was performed at the Cambridge Junction Theatre in July 2021 as part of Menagerie Theatre Company’s Hotbed Festival.