From sky doc
Once upon a time when suicide was the notion that time
is the best healer my dad in the garden
stuffing his body with sky I was sixteen
before anyone told me anything
my dad chased me out the house
in his favourite blue sweater I remember
in the park I bumped into a teacher
where are your shoes she said
Once upon a time when suicide was the butterfly bruise
that happens to the sky
when a nose gets broken the slow lakes
that pool and the four stages of colour
suicide slow dancing with my mum
under spotlight even the fish are impressed
I want very much to make a father
of suicide to climb inside and sleep there
Once upon a time when suicide was the greatest magician
to ever spend a night in my treehouse
in the 90s I wanted to die
before anyone told me about my family’s
mythology my hereditary a procession
of beetles heading for an ocean
for a second I’m Micky Mouse in Fantasia
suicide will be home from work soon
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Joe Carrick-Varty is a British-Irish poet, writer and founding editor of bath magg. His poems have appeared in the New Statesman,The Poetry Review, Poetry Ireland Review and Poetry London. He won an Eric Gregory Award in 2022. His debut collection, More Sky, is forthcoming with Carcanet in 2023.